Applying the Coolidge Effect

I chose Animal Husbandry, by Laura Zigman,  for the chick lit group because I thought it would stimulate conversation about men and how they treat women, which it really didn’t.  What we ended up discussing was the neuroses of women who can’t really get on with life after being dismissed by someone they thought they were in love with, who they thought was in love with them.  

I like Zigman’s books, and her writing style.  I also like that she worked for ten years before she started writing, and that she wasn’t a lawyer (please – is there anyone out there who ISN’T a lawyer who is now a writer?), and that she writes (her words) “thinly-disguised autobiographical novels”.  I mean, who hasn’t been dumped?  Who hasn’t obsessed about a boyfriend’s/fiance’s/husband’s ex- or present significant other?  Who hasn’t agonized over working or staying at home with their children?  (Actually, me – at least the first one.  I have never really been dumped…at least not unceremoniously.)

By the way – anyone who has seen the movie Someone Like You with Ashley Judd and the always-luscious Hugh Jackman would recognize this book as the background for the movie.  Some things were changed in the making of the film, although I won’t give those away.

The premise of the book is how a woman tries to explain being unceremoniously dumped – with no warning, nothing to clue her in to what might be happening or why it happened at all.  She develops, and publishes (under a pseudonym) a theory on human male behavior based on the Coolidge Effect – and while one would expect all manner of hell to break loose as a result of that (one difference I will reveal between the book and the movie) – it does not.  What it does do is lead this woman to a rather blunt realization that she wasted a lot of time and energy on a narcissistic jerk, trying to explain to herself why he dumped her.  I’ve  known a lot of people who have done just that…they’ve spent days, months, or even years agonizing over the “whys” of a break up – well beyond the accepted grieving period for such an event, until one day they inexplicably “wake up” and realize the person was never worth all of the expended energy after all.  What could, in essence, be referred to as an “Aha!” moment. 

That’s what I like about Zigman’s books – they reveal the slightest bit of neurosis in the main character, that, if one delves deeply enough, one can find in oneself…because, believe me, if you look hard enough, you’ll find that it’s there.

Watermelon by Marian Keyes

I just love Marian Keyes.  She has a great writing style, and she’s funny.  Last year for Book Club we read Anybody Out There, which was about Anna Walsh – and we discovered that Marian has written books about all the Walsh sisters (except Helen, we’re all hoping she does that sometime soon).  We chose Watermelon not only because it was the first book about the Walsh sisters (and Marian’s first, also, I think), but also because one of our members loved it.

I really enjoyed it – it was a fast read…I took it on vacation with me and zipped right though it.  It surprises me that there’s no reading guide associated with it, because it brings up a lot of relevant questions.  We argued a little bit at our discussion about the nature of this woman’s problems.  Her husband, you see, leaves her immediately after the birth of their first child, and madness ensues.  Alot of us couldn’t get past that.  She completely crumbles (realistic enough) and bounces back, even meets a new guy and has a chance at love…until her ex comes back into the picture.  For me, the circumstances surrounding his return were far-fetched, and if my husband had come back to me the way this woman’s did her – I would’ve kicked him out of my life.  I wouldn’t have allowed him to come back.  But the character, who’s supposed to be independent and strong, from an equally strong Irish family, backs down and questions the very essence of herself, which I (and other readers in our group) found uncharacteristic for her, given her previous descriptions.  Overall, though, I liked the book.  And it sparked great discussion for our group.